Seen

I pushed today. I wasn’t scared. Were my results optimal? Don’t care. Process-oriented ACTION TAKING. Being in the light. Believing that God is interceding. Challenging me in the right ways no matter how impossible some obstacles may seem. I feel young at heart. My passion is burning. My desire is aflame. 

   I did my best to listen today. I sat back and appreciated others. My energy was cool and calm. This is new. It almost seems like the more adversity I seek, the better I perform  – meaning in a natural way. I’m so impressed with the character traits I am developing and I’m so excited about the future. 

   I know that I matter and to me, humility means knowing in my bones that I deserve as much as the happiest and wealthiest person in the world. I’ll never stop fighting and that gives me peace. What may seem like arrogance or naïveté to others, I know comes from a place of running aground so many times by underestimating and downplaying my personal power and abilities. There is truly no honor in it. There is honor in optimism, routine, consistency, struggle, ownership, working despite: pain, shame and self-blame. Humiliation, even. 

   I have finally found my path. Some day I will meet my maker and I want Him to see in my heart and soul that I did the best I could to fulfill the opportunities He gave me. That I appreciated the Grace, Hope and Courage that She gave me. I will be with them one day. Whether it is soon or distant is up to them but they are always on my heart and mind.